Interdependence Issues

Being in Relationship Without Losing Yourself

Interdependence is the ability to connect with others while remaining connected to yourself—true relational balance.

Where It Comes From

Interdependence is damaged when childhood relationships model:

• Enmeshment → teaches over-connection and self-abandonment
• Neglect or abandonment → teaches isolation or anti-dependency
• Inconsistent caregiving → makes connection feel unreliable
• Caretaking roles → teaches the child to focus on others’ needs while ignoring their own
• Trauma bonds → create confusion between love and survival

Adults may experience:

• People-pleasing
• Fear of abandonment
• Difficulty leaving harmful relationships
• Avoidance of intimacy
• Self-abandonment
• Hypervigilance toward others’ needs
• Feeling “too much” or “not enough” in relationships

How to Heal It

1. Rebuild secure internal attachment.
   Inner-child work helps you become the safe base you didn’t have.
2. Practice relational truth.
   Share your reality and needs openly.
3. Strengthen self-connection.
   You cannot be interdependent if you disconnect from yourself.
4. Choose safe people.
   Interdependence thrives only in relationships with mutual respect.
5. Set boundaries consistently.
   Connection and boundaries must coexist.
6. Work toward mutuality.
   Healthy relationships are reciprocal—not one-sided.

Interdependence is the culmination of all core practices—it allows for deep connection without losing your selfhood.